I’m a very bright old fart who adores writing, be it fiction or tech. But that certainly isn’t how my career began: far, far from it.
I attended the illustrious AADA (American Academy of Dramatic Arts) with an eye to hitting the stage. Wound up in Florida doing commercials and several movies, one of which was the end of my film career!
It would be fun, they said. Nobody would ever see it, they said – and supplied me with a short black 50’s flip wig to ensure it. I’d look great in that shower scene, they said. And – I repeat – nobody would ever see it.
EXCEPT the Playboy photographers who showed up on a closed set wearing sober suits like money dudes for the director. And a year later, I got a phone call full of screaming curses – my mom, of course – ranting that her best friend had just called and what was Cat doing in Playboy?
Cat almost croaked on that set from catering that sat in the sun for days. Not to mention mosquitoes who had their own zip code – shot the flick in the ‘Glades. Sounding familiar yet? “Nobody will ever see it,” they said. “Straight to drive-ins,” they said. “Piece of shit for a tax-writeoff,” on and on.
Sure. Nobody EVER saw “Porkies,” did they now? Not to mention a certain writer’s naked arse in that infamous shower scene.
I went straight back to Tennessee, got my bachelor’s in Computer Science. Never hit a film set again. Written a few, mind you!
Currently I’m back in TN, living with my daughter – she brought her Schnauzer to the party – my 3 Siamese and a German Shepherd. Along with countless deer, coons, rabbits, squirrels, groundhogs, foxes – and quite possibly, a Chupacabra who appeared on our walkway one day.
Older, none the wiser, still getting in the weirdest trouble possible. And that’s more than enough About Me!